Vaca 2020 - Day 4 - Swamp Boat Tour

So... I'm a big, fat sissy. I do not like things like this. If I am to see a gator, I prefer it to be on a screen or behind hurricane rated glass. I'm not interested in "the real thing".  

Why?  Because the real thing is likely to lunge at me, rip a vein out of my neck and kill me and that is strictly on my list of "ways NOT TO GO!".  

But of course, these critters do not seem very clever and so I'm pretty sure that they do not care about my mortality (or lack thereof) list.

So as this day began, I was watching the weather and HOPING BY THE GRACE OF GOD that we would have thunderstorms and the good company would return our money and we would drive back East into New Orleans "disappointed" but "exuberant" about our next adventure (lunch).  

Thankfully, it didn't work out that way.

Let's get to the story.

Upon arrival, they had a real, live Yeti that would pose with for pics. Pretty sweet!  But please note, this was Clarence, not Darrell.

I challenged Clarence's bad self.  He won, but not by much!

This was the albino gator that they had inside the ticket shack.  He had pretty good roaming room.  I'm not sure what kind of survival stats the albino has. Honestly, I have no clue now that I think of it in greater detail.  Perhaps I have a take-a-way?

One of those floating death traps is ours...  We just don't know which one we'll die on yet.

OMG YES!!!!  Thunderstorms are rolling in!!  Perhaps we'll get refunded yet!?!?

Sweet, sweet rain with the occasional lightning. Nearly perfect.

Welp, that didn't work.  After a roughly hour-long delay, we boarded our wet-arse-death-traps to go be fed to hungry gators who have been cooped up and p!$$ed off about the quarantine.  It's obvious to ME that they will be extra hungry and aggressive due to their loneliness...  I may be the only passenger who realizes this as we head to sea...   *sigh*

SEE!!!!!   This looks like an alley that you wouldn't dare go thru where I grew up and I had a pretty good youth!

Yep... trouble ahead. For God's sake!!

Satan arrives and here we are snapping pictures, excited like a bunch of city folks looking at baby pigs being born at the Iowa State Fair.  It's gross.  It's horrible... but there we all are. year after year. C'mon man...

So Satan's approach wasn't bad enough that the driver of this boat took us down this alley...

Oddly enough, after a short bit, you emerge into an area like this again.

And then again, long alley way' s like this.  You never knew what was coming once the boat turned the next corner.

Yep, we're going into that even though nobody asked Ted if this was okay....

and what does a fella encounter in such alleys?  Trash like this!!  Honestly, I was getting used to them approaching and their rather docile behavior where I was thinking I would not die.

Off we go down a different "alley" when we meet one of the other tour boats.  We saw a few of them but this is the only one that we actually "crossed paths" with. Makes you wonder how extensive these water paths are...

Another "friend" approaching.

Just outside the boat,  and another reminder that I was espescially clever picking the middle seat!!!

Again...

Momma Chaos and a very willing participant, Robert the Honored!!!

Calebber and my big-arsed nose!!!

This kid was excited about this back in Iowa when we were planning a back-up to our Alaskan trip.  This boat tour was right up his alley!!

New Orleans in the distance.

He looks ornery!  

By this point, I was getting pretty comfortable...  and by comfortable, I mean that I'm comfortable with the Southern, toothless dude driving our boat giving the gators a marshmallow or two.  Nothing more!

See!!!  The LOVE of marshmallows...

 

The tour guide spoke of the effect that it has had on the gators.  He talked of the trust they had with the tour boats and after 4 months of shutdowns, the gators aren't very receptive to the boats like they were.  He was clearly sad about his buddy's distress as I think this guy clearly loved his job and the gators he visits!

But for me, being back on terra firma is a goood thing, however, this was a KILLER tour and one of the highlights of our vacation.